My Biggest Teacher Pet Peeve

There is one sentence I heard over and over again as a classroom math teacher. It usually happened at open house or meet the teacher. And maybe that's why it bothered me so much.

You see- meet the teacher wasn't just a casual evening where I showed up, shook some hands, and pointed parents and their students towards my classroom. By the time anyone walked through my door, I had already spent days preparing for them. I had spent the week attending continued learning seminars, sitting through professional development, thinking through classroom procedures, refining my syllabus, organizing materials, preparing lessons and trying to anticipate the needs of the students I hadn't even met yet.

I was thinking about how I wanted my classroom to feel.

I was thinking about how I could make difficult concepts understandable.

I was thinking about how to make my classroom accessible for every learner.

And underneath all of that preparation was something that I don't think parents always got to see:

I cared deeply about their child.

I hadn't even met them yet, but I was already pouring my heart into the year ahead. I wanted my students to walk into my classroom and know that I believed they could learn. I wanted them to feel safe asking questions. I wanted them to understand that getting an answer wrong wasn't a reason to feel embarrassed. I wanted them to leave my classroom knowing more than they knew when they walked in—and maybe with a little more confidence in themselves.

So, imagine standing at your classroom door after a week of preparing, excited- and a little nervous- to meet your new students and their families.

A parent walks up.

You introduce yourself.

They introduce themselves.

You tell them you're their child's math teacher.

And almost immediately, they smile and say:

“Oh, math? I was never good at math. I never understood it. It was just too hard for me.”

And maybe they mean it as a joke.

Maybe they're trying to make conversation.

Maybe they're trying to relate to their child.

But as a teacher, I'll be honest:

Sometimes it felt like a gut-punch.

Not because I was offended that they didn't like math.

Not because I expected them to recite the quadratic formula from heart.

And not because I believed everyone should have been good at math in school.

It was because I knew that their child was standing somewhere nearby, listening.

And I knew that their parent had just unintentionally handed them a story.

“Math is hard.”

“I wasn't good at it, so maybe you won't be either.”

“It's okay if you don't understand it.”

And suddenly, before I had even taught their child a single lesson, the student could walk into my classroom carrying a preconceived idea about who they were as a mathematician.

That was the part that broke my heart.

Because I had spent the entire week preparing to tell their child:

“I believe you can do this.”

And sometimes the very first thing they heard from someone they trusted was:

“I couldn't.”

So Let's Change the Narrative:

And it begins with tearing down the misconception that some people are "math" people and some people aren't. Math is a skill, not an identity. Like any other skill, it can be learned, refined and mastered.

No one is born knowing how to factor a quadratic or solve a system of equations. Some students will learn these skills quickly. Others will need more examples, more practice, a different explanation or more time. That doesn't mean one student is “a math person” and the other isn't.

It means they are both learners at different points in the process.

I've had students who walked into my classroom convinced they couldn't do math. Then, along the way, something clicked. They solved a problem they had previously thought was impossible.

Then another.

And another.

Suddenly their entire attitude changed- not because they magically became smarter- because they discovered something incredibly valuable:

“Wait…I can actually do this.”

That moment is powerful. (That is why I became a teacher because I live for those moments!)

As a parent, I am not asking you to pretend math is easy and invalidate your student's struggles.

Actually, I am asking you to do the opposite.

I am asking you to agree with them when they complain, "Math is hard!" and put their head down on the kitchen table. I am asking you to validate their struggles, challenges and anxieties. Listen to every "I can't do this!" but I am pleading with you- don't let the interaction end there. Tell them:

"Math is hard, but you are up for the challenge." or "You can't do this yet. But I know you will persevere through this."

Your child doesn't need you to persuade them that math is easy.

They need to hear you say that you believe they are capable of learning hard things.

And honestly- that's one of the greatest gifts we can give our children—not just in math, but in life.